Wednesday, December 31, 2008

New Year's Resolutions

Well my resolutions are a mix this year of things to do for myself, my family, my man and my children.

First of all I will get to the most imporant.

I want to work on continueing to be a more patient mom and in not yelling at all. My new's year's resolution in this area is to find time each night to do one small special thing with each of my kiddos. Also to spend time with Andrew doing a daily devotion and to read at least one story per night to the two kids. I want a strong family and I want to work on teaching my children strong values. I also want to be able to make it to church when Andrew is home at least every time that we are here in IL and not out of town or on vacation. I also want to make it a point to take a family vacation and to take a day away with Andrew alone to have some special time with us, we are thinking that this will probably be to St Louis to Six Flags so that we can ride the rides with him and such.

I want to work on my relationship with Shane to continue to improve my trust in him as I was in a place where I could not trust anyone fully when we met and now I feel myself moving on so I want to work on being able to trust him more. I want to work on being able to give him back something more as I feel like sometimes it is as though he just gives and gives and gives and because of where I have been I feel like there are times when I continue to take rather than putting things into perspective and giving back. I want to work on us trying a little experiment prompted by a book I saw where a woman wrote about what she learned by having sex every day for a year. So we are going to attempt this one but there will be days that we miss when we are apart and not together mostly. I also want to work on planning a wedding for the two of us and being able to have a wedding where we can fully express our feelings and beliefs and for it not to be overrun by traditions or values that are not imporant to us.

I want to work on being a better sister to my wondeful little brother. I want to work on being more supportive and kind towards him as he is so wonderful at being an uncle and a brother and he is always thinking of others. I also want to work on appreciating my parents more and becoming closer to both of them.

Now onto things that I would like to do for myself. I would like to reach a healthy BMI and be in good physical shape. I am vowing to work out on a regular basis and to keep a food/exercise journal as this seems to really help me. I am enjoying working out with the new Jillian Michael's Ultimatum that is available for the Wii and Wii Fit. I also am going to be getting the My Fitness Coach which will be nice so that I can switch things up a bit between them and the Wii Fit disc and hopefully not become too bored during any of this. I am not looking to reach a specific weight but rather an overall level of health and fitness and nurtrition. I am wanting to further explore becoming a vegetarian. I know that it is hard, I did it for a few months in the past and there were times when it really sucked but I also know that my body felt so much better and that I was so much stronger in how my body was working with things that this really seems like something that is going to better myself physically. I also want to learn how to sew. I am planning on grabbing my mom's sewing machine one day soon and going to Wal-Mart to buy a pattern for an easy sundress for Althea and to attempt to do something on my own. I am hoping that I can learn to sew now and eventually learn to sew well enough to be able to make myself skirts, patchwork pants, apron tops, and all other kinds of things that I think are fun and cute and look at and think, wow I could make that and it would cost so much less. I am going to also make a conscious effort to go to my grandma's more and to finish up the sundress that we started together last summer prior to Althea being born. I also want to work on journaling on a daily basis, blogging on a daily basis, keeping an exercise and food journal to help keep me accountable to those issues and I would like to start and finish a book over the next year. Not sure what type of book I am going to start to write about first but I would like to eventually write for a living which would be so awesome!!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Christmas Happenings!

Well our Christmases were all wonderful but it is nice to have things slow down a bit!

We started off our holiday on the 23rd, the night that Santa visited our house. We made him fresh baked cookies and then got Andrew to bed and then Santa came. Then on Thursday morning we woke up and had fun opening all of the presents and playing with our new things. Then we went to my mom and dad's and celebrated with them and my brother before the rest of the fam came over and we celebrated with them. Then it was off to bring Andrew to his dad's and head out to Kansas.

I drove to Kansas and we got there at a bright and early 4:30 am. Then we got to do the whole family picture thing and spend the day celebrating at Shane's grandma's house. Then we went back to his mom's and just relaxed for the rest of the night. Then we celebrated Christmas with his mom and siblings and their families. After which we had lunch and celebrated with Shane's grandfather. I can say all in all that I have two spoiled children and that I had a great time celebrating all of the holiday festivities. It was nice to finally be home yesturday and today we are getting the house organized so I am going to be going and getting on that one!!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Santa Claus Comes Tonight

Well, tonight is our celebrated Christmas Eve as Andrew is at his dad's on Christmas this year. So Santa is going to make a special trip and visit us a day early. I am so excited to see the kids when they get their presents. It sucks that poor little Allie is sick and not feeling well, she has a virus and she is just very lethargic and puney whereas I think that she would actually be more into looking at the toys and such if she were feeling better. They got their Christmas Eve gifts a while ago and Andrew is already chilling in his new jammies and Allie will be soon. Their Christmas pictures will be so cute this year.

I've had quite the week, stayed at my mom's the past few nights and was up a lot with Althea as she was ill. Shane has night time duty tonight though as I am driving to Kansas tomorrow when we leave so that he can drink some beers and relax this time round. I am going to get to relax on the ride home on Monday which is actually preferred for me as that is the day before I have to go back to work, so it will be nice to actually have some time to chill after the holiday. Then it is back to work for a simple two days and then off for the new year holiday.

I am just so excited to see everyone and to celebrate the day together. We will be up early, do the things here, play some here and then we will be headed to my mom's where we are going to order Davis Brothers Pizza and open presents with them and my brother and then we will be having my extended family over to celebrate, then heading out, dropping Andrew off at his dad's and going to Kansas. It will be a good time!

I am also excited for Shane to get his gift from me. I got him plane tickets to Austin TX to see his brother on his brother's birthday and then I will fly out two days later and we will fly home two days after I get there so he will have some guy time alone and then we will have a short trip together. I just didn't want to leave Andrew and Allie and I didn't want to leave them for more than two nights.

Well I am going to go and basque in my current state, I have a gorgeous baby sleeping on my chest and I have a wonderful partner who is downstairs playing Wii with my amazing son. It is so cute to think about how things are and to celebrate the holidays and what not as a family. It is our first Christmas at our new home and one that I am sure will bring many memories for us to have a magical time together as a family!

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Well this weekend has been interesting. I was so bummed that Andrew didn't have his little party at school on Friday, I stayed up late Thursday night making rice krispie treat gingerbread men and putting together cute little Santa bags with them and a candy cane for the kids. I also had gotten Andrew's gift for the gift exchange, a Ben 10 toy and a gift for his teacher all that were supposed to go to school on Friday. I am sincerely hoping that they reschedule for a time when I can go to the party as I was so excited to get to be the room parent for this one. Who knows though, maybe his teacher will let me come to the Valentine's Party since I wasn't able to come to this one and she knows that I want to be as involved as possible in this one.

The storm was bad and it is again getting bad. We did get to go most of the day on Friday without the internet or netflix and all of the day without cable. We spent some time playing Wii together and Andrew was staying with Grandma and Grandpa so he had a good time as well. I am kind of nervous that we might lose our power tonight with the added new ice and the fact that our lights have flickered a few times. Losing power with Andrew and Althea would be realy bad. I would be so worried about not having heat for the two of them, not so much worried for myself but especially worried for the baby. Too bad we don't have a propane heater we only have electric space heaters. Well I am going to watch Elf and spend some time with Shane and the kiddos but just wanted to update that we are fareing well in the storm only I hope to continue to remain as lucky as we have yet to lose power and I would prefer to keep it that way.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

The Weather Outside is Bad!!

So the weather outside here in IL is crappy. It took me almost two hours to get home after work. Peoria, Pekin and East Peoria were all disasters but funny thing is that the closer I got to Canton, well the better the weather got for once as usually it is worse around here.

So Allie is becoming my little chatty one as she is constantly cooing and trying to talk. It is so cute. She talked to me nearly my whole ride home today!! Andrew is getting excited about his Christmas party at school so that is cute as well.

Monday, December 15, 2008

12 hour day, oh I am so ready!

So from the title I am betting that you can all guess how long I was at work today, yep I worked over 12 hours today, started billing with clients at 6:18 am and didn't stop until 6:40 pm. I am so frustrated. It sucks having to look for a new job in the winter and then again it sucks having to be outside with clients all day when it is so cold. I got to go to two different Aldi stores, Save A Lot and a gas station today with clients...yay!

Not much else is going on, the kids are doing well and I finally got Christmas presents under our tree. I am so excited to see their little faces after Santa visits.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Only a few more days til Christmas...

I can't believe that we will be celebrating Christmas so soon. Of course at my house this year we will be celebrating Christmas eve and doing our Christmas eve traditions on the 23rd as Andrew is at his dad's on Christmas this year. Then we are celebrating Christmas on the 24th.

I am so excited about starting some new traditions this year. We did decorate our stockings and it was so much fun to paint them with the kids. They had a good time and they were so cute doing it!

So here are our traditions, the weekend before Christmas we are going to be making homemade candy. On Christmas Eve we are going to give the kids one gift, it is going to be pretty much the same thing from here on out, new pjs, new clothes/shirts to wear on Christmas day, a cuddley, and a new Christmas book. For Christmas the new tradition is that Santa is no longer wrapping his presents. I just thought that Andrew almost figured it out last year with my mom that there was no Santa as he didn't understand how grandma and Santa could have the same wrapping paper so form now on Santa is not wrapping his presents. The kids will have presents to open from each other and us under our tree and obviously from other family when we are other places.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Seeing Santa

We took the kids to see Santa today. They both did well and we got a really cute picture as Andrew was smiling and Allie was not crying and looking at the camera. They are some of the cutest pictures of Santa that I have ever seen. We got to ride some rides and hang out and have a good time with grandma and grandpa and great grandma Dorothy in tow. It was all nice! They enjoyed seeing Santa and riding the rides and then for Andrew to put his letter in the mailbox for Santa.

Letters To Santa

So Andrew and I sat down so that he could write his letter to Santa the other day and it was so cute. He is doing so well with spelling and writing and of course he had me spell the words but he had fun guessing the letters as well. He told Santa in his letter that he wanted the Wii The Blob game, Wii Crash of the Titans and the cupcake maker. Then tonight when we went to see Santa, well he got to put his letter in Santa's mailbox and he was excited because he was afraid that the mail would not really get the letter to Santa.

Roly Poly Bug

Allie is such a roly poly bug. She has now realized that she can roll to get where she wants and this has resulted in her rolling all of the time and actually covernig some ground while she rolls. She does get mad when she rolls somewhere and gets stuck. She is also really learning how to use her hands, but gets frustrated when she can't seem to get them to do what she wants. I am just so super amazed and surprised at how big she is growing up and the thought of her being able to get all over the place and into things so soon is so overwhelming!

It's been a hard one!

So I have been having a super hard time lately. There are so many things in my life that are causing me stress and at times I am not sure what to do about it all. Let's see so work is one of the main sources of my stress right now and at times I feel like I am going to end up crazy dealing with all of the shit! There are just so many things about the agency that have me upset, like the idea that I was supposed to have a raise by June and still there has been no raise, I am really upset about this as I feel that they should not have represented things this way when I was hired if it was not something that they planned on following through with. Also recently I got a flat tire in my client's driveway and I was told that there could be a possibility of them paying for the tire that was destroyed while on the line of duty at work. To date nothing has been done and when I have asked about it most of the people I am asking are simply ignoring me and not following through with things. Honestly no matter what happens to me from here on out I can honestly say that since this is by far the worst place that I have been employed with at this time I think that I would like to find employment some place better. If things were worse I do not know what I would do about this as there are so many problems that I am just about to freak out. I actually hope on a daily basis to be able to be fired as then I could get unemployment while I looked for something else. Things are just not going well and all in all it has been a horrible work experience being here.

I am going back to school in January. I am going to be working on earning my prerequisites to be able to attend medical school. I am tired of working full time and worrying about how the bills are going to be paid. Yep, I want to be able to make all of the bills on time each month and have a savings and have things paid off and overall to not worry about things at all. So the MCATs will be soon and that kind of scares me as these were not my top subjects in school but I am sure that I have the ability with studying and hard work to do well at whatever challenge is placed in front of me. At least now while I am interviewing my future employers are all aware of my plan to go back to school and they are all aware that I am working hard to accomplish certain goals and have certain achievements in my life. I am looking into a lot of part time jobs and if I get this really cool one at the Center for Prevention of Abuse then I am going to attempt to find a breakfast waitressing job for the weekdays that I could work with said schedule that way my job and school would be the normal Mon-Fri. I might look into some lunch time waitressing jobs as well. I just think that these would give me the same amount of money and I know that there are great opportunities for private health care through the state now so I am not too concerned with that either.

The kids are doing great. Andrew has started a journal and we are working on finding the time to work on it every day. I think that journaling is a great outlet and I love that I am able to work with him and give him those skills at such a young age. Other than that, well life is life. There are always good things to deal with and always bad. The bad for now seem to be work, court coming up and finances but the good far outweight these areas, like my two awesome children and my amazing relationship and boyfriend who is so encouraging, the fact that I am able to go back to school, my little brother's support as we are going to attempt medical school together, the fact that I have all that I need and a beautiful home to have it in. Also that I am able to have food on my table and these things, all of which I know are such a priviledge in a country where there are people who are starving on a regular basis, something that I would not really know anything about.

Thursday, November 27, 2008


So I have been reflective this Thanksgiving about all of the things that I am thankful for. I am so thankful for the life that I live and the simple joys that I have every day that others are not as fortunate to have. I am thankful for my children, they are amazing and they make me happier each time that I get to spend a moment with them. I only hope that I am always able to make them as happy as they make me.

I am thankful for Shane, he is wonderful and I could not have asked for a more perfect man to share my life with. I am thankful for my family, most of all my 'rents and bro. They are all amazing people whom I can share great things with. I am thankful for the close friends that I have and the aquaintences that I have as well. I am thankful for my job and for the fact that even though my employment is not as good as what I would hope for that I have employment during this time of great economic need in our country.

And lastly but certainly not least, I am thankful for our troops who are risking their lives each and every day and some of them giving up their lives so that I can have the freedoms and liberty which I enjoy. I will be the first to admit that I am antiwar but I do respect those who are following out the orders to which they are given.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Update to my crazy life!!

Hello is good and I am truly blessed and thankful to have the life that I have.

Andrew is growing up so fast. He is starting to read and he is able to tell me things that I thought it would take him years to figure out. I guess he is just getting too big too fast for his momma...I am so bummed that my baby boy is growing up before my eyes and becoming such a big boy! He is starting to read some words and I know that reading books is just around the corner for him and that makes me both happy and sad. One of my favorite things to do with him is to sit and read and be able to spend that time together sharing, it is awesome!! I know though that soon it will not be necessary for mommy to read to him and that he is going to want to go off and read alone and that sucks in some ways!! I am so happy and proud of him though and I feel such a love for him as he gets older and I know that he will just have to grow up but sometimes that is too hard for me to deal with.

Althea is getting big as well. She is learning how to mimick sounds and things that we do. She discovered that she could do the kissing sound with daddy the other day and she was so proud of that one. She is also a huge girly girl as she had her toenails painted by grandma and she is so proud to show them off...we will ask her where her "pretty toes" are and she will hold up her foot and just smile so big. She is also learning to make appropriate expressions for how she is feeling. She has such a timid and sweet personality and she is so easily startled or scared when she hears certain noises.

Work is going well. I am starting to facilitate anger management group in a few weeks and I am hoping to get my stuff together for Self Esteem group to have it start after the holidays. I feel blessed that I get to work a four day week at my job and I am hoping to be able to get on a more set schedule and just have Fridays off in the future as I know that this would work better for leading that second group.

Not much else is going on...we are super busy all of the time and I don't look for that to slow down with all of the holiday happenings.

I am super excited to be surprising Shane this weekend for his birthday. I have such a good surprise planned for him and I can't wait to see how happy it makes him. That is going to be our first night away from little Althea though and I am kind of freaking out over this one. Let's see and then there is the big Christmas surprise...yep I think that I did really good this year and I so proud of what I did...he will love it so much!! I just can't wait to see his face when he opens his gift from me. Other than that I am so excited to see the kids on Christmas...I think that between myself and Shane and Santa Claus and then the family Andrew is going to get all that he asked for so he should be super happy!! Also Althea is getting some things that I think will make her really excited so I am excited about those as well. I am almost done with my xmas shopping, just a few more things overall and some things for the stockings and it is all done for xmas for our house....yay!!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

My Crazy Life

Well, I just wish sometimes that things would slow down, I mean slow way down. Things have just been freakin' crazy around me. I am up at 4:00-4:30 am every morning to get ready for work, get the baby ready, drop her off at my mom's and be at work by 6:30 am. On days when I get to sleep in, usually I am still up around 5:00-5:30 is crazy!! Sometimes I feel as though I am so sleep deprived that I simply can not take not being able to get some more sleep sometime.

The kids are great!! Althea is getting bigger each and every day and is growing up so fast that I can not believe that she is already 3 1/2 months old. I love that she "talks" and coos and that she laughs and tries to sing along with you when you are singing to her. She is starting to notice things and she loves when we all sit around and read books every night prior to when Andrew goes to bed. She loves reading and laughs and interacts with the pictures. So far it seems that "Fox In Socks" by Dr Seues is her favorite. She laughs and sometimes you have to read it more than once to her so that she is not crying when you are finished.

Andrew is growing like a weed as well. He is definilty in a size 5 and not a 5T, as those are starting to be too short for him. He is into all of the big boy things now and is no longer my baby. He is so freakin' funny too...I absolutely love it when he giggles and laughs and acts all silly so much of the time. He is super sweet about his baby sister too so that is nice as well.

Shane and I are great...working on the things that average couples work on and learning to lean on each other more and all in all we get along very well, even when we are angry or irritated with each other we are able to talk about things so that is nice as well.

As for work, well I am still at the Human Service Center in Peoria, still working with adults with severe and persistent mental illness...we are no longer considered a CST team but we are still basically doing the same things that a CST team did so it is kind of silly that we are not the same that we once were. I enjoy working in this type of field and have thought about leaving because of the fact that the money sucks and I really would like to feel as though I were working full time for a reason...but I am super excited about the prospect of working for the state in the prison systems as these types of jobs are available there and I would love to be able to work in that capacity and the money is great there as well, almost two times what I now make.

Life is going pretty well all in all..there have been some reccent rough patches but I have kept perservereing through them all and it seems as though all is going to turn out well!!

Monday, August 25, 2008

It's Been A While

Well, it has been forever sine I have written. Let's see, we had our beautiful baby girl!! Althea Raelea Walton was born on July 15, 2008 and weighed 8 lbs 8 oz and was 20" long. She is amazing!! I love her with all of my heart and can now remember how I felt when Andrew was born. Andrew is doing awesome at being a big brother and he really loves his baby sister a lot!! He is not nearly as jealous or as crazy as I would have thought that he was going to be.

Weight loss is coming, very slowly to say the least but coming all the same!! I can't believe how much slower it seems to be happening after baby #2. I don't know if I am being realistic or not though b/c in 15 lbs I will be the weight that I most often was after having Andrew, at least for the first 4 years of his life so I don't know that I really had that much more of a hard time this time or if I am just wanting to lose too much too fast!!

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Been a While

Well, it has been a while since I last wrote and so much has been happening and going on. First off, I am off of work and on bedrest until the baby comes...that has been both difficult and interesting, difficult b/c I hate to sit around and do nothing and interesting b/c I have found out a lot about bad television and been playing a lot of video games and such! Also trying to care for Andrew has been interesting b/c of course he needs a lot of help with things and wants his mommy to help him.

I am home now after a busy and long week. I went to my mom and dad's last Saturday to go to the Farmer's Market and such and ended up not coming home until yesturday, it was weird being away from home for so long but I do have to say that I enjoyed being in a place where the air conditioning was readily available. It has been a little hot since I have gotten home. Andrew went to Darren's yesturday and is not supposed to be back until the 18th which seems like such a long time. I know that I am really going to miss him a ton.

There is so much to do and plan for and so much work to get done in the next 7 days before the baby is born. I am being induced at 12:01 am on the 15th so the baby will be here in a week.

Monday, May 19, 2008

So Much Going On...Busy Next Few Weeks!

Well a lot has happened in the past few weeks since I have wrote. There are changes being made at work...yay! More stuff to do in the same amount of time!! I have great news on the four day work week as I am going to start having Fridays off after this week! I am so excited to be moving on to a four day work week. I can't wait to get to spend that extra day with Andrew, the move has been hard on him as he was used to be having a four day week when I lived in Indiana and he has had to go without that since I have moved here.

The baby is doing well, she is getting big and she remains so active. She actually causes pain at time and most of the time I am uncomfortable now. The main thing that I have learned is that I need to continuously eat and have food around me and I feel better, except the fact that I am balooning to some huge proportions. And with that in mind I have developed a small workout routine that I am going to make myself do every afternoon when I get home from work or in the mornings when I wake up super early! I am going to be doing three sets of 10 repetitions of a few butt and thigh toning moved and some basic stuff for my arms which are more fat than I think that they have ever been. I even made myself a work out spreadsheet to remind myself to do them. I am still not worrying about what I eat as I usually just eat what I am craving and figure that the baby wants those foods for a reason and so therefore I give them to her!

I go to my 32 week appointment next week!! Then I have my 34 week appointment at which they will do another sonogram and then they will take the stiches out of my cervix...I am a bit worried about this and how painful it might be!! Then just a few short weeks after this Miss Delilah will finally grace us with her presense. There is so much that I want to have done before she gets here!! I am hoping to use my Fridays off work to get some of the housework done during Andrew's play times and then to work on things that he is not doing other times. Anyways I can't believe that in just 5 weeks she could be here and be healthy...I need to carry her until at least week 36 as that is when she can be born healthy but I am hoping to have her at 36 or 37 weeks! So just a few more weeks and I am done, thank God!! I love knowing that she is growing and that my body is nourishing her health but I also would like to feel good and not so crappy anymore!

Andrew's first t-ball game is tonight! I can't wait to watch him as I think that those types of things are so darn cute!

The next few weeks are going to be busy ones....this weekend we are going camping in Kansas with Andrew, the following week is my baby shower here in IL. We are excpecting some family in from out of town as well. Then the following week, we are going to Wakarusa Music Festival for one or two days (depends on how the camping goes this weekend). Andrew starts summer camp the first week in June! Then he is at his dad's for a week, while at his dad's Shane and I and my parents are going to see Phil Lesh and Friends in Chicago! Hmm...let's see then there is the Universal Rhythm Assembly coming up at the end of June in Peoria on the riverfront. Not much else for the month of June except hopefully having this baby! LOL!

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Mommy Things!

It's the day before Mother's Day! Things here are going well! I am just getting ready to run and pick up two hanging baskets (one for my grandma and one for my aunt) for mom's day! Depending on prices and what they have, I might also be picking up one for myself! I wouldn't mind seeing a few flowers on my front porch, it would make our house a bit homey. For my mom, well she is getting a digital photo keychain...yep something that I want that is not too expensive that I have yet to purchase for myself.

I've been doing the house cleaning thing as the family is coming over for dinner tomorrow night! We are doing a whole Mexican thing. I got all of the dusting done and still need to finish up the kitchen this evening as well as finish sweeping floors! I want to wait on the bathrooms until tomorrow morning so that they smell super clean! I am kind of a bathroom freak!

Anyways what types of mom day plans do my readers have? Anything interesting planned! Not much going on here. We are just going to be getting up and relaxing, possibly going out to a late breakfast if Andrew is cool with that. I know that it sounds odd to say it that way but it is always easier to do breakfast when you know that the kid is going to behave. I guess I will probably try bribing him as he wanted a laser toy that was in some stupid quarter machine at this one little place here in Canton and I guess that I will probably tell him if he goes and sits nicely through breakfast that we will get that laser toy! That should make it where we can go and get some good eats and he will be cooperative!

Money Issues!!

Well things are finally getting better in the money department for me! I have been freaked out as I have had bills bills and more bills and seemingly they keep getting bigger! I just got approved for a new credit card, and it is a high enough balance to pay off the other two credit cards that I have with a balance transfer!! Yay!! I am going to be able to pay them off with 0% interest until June of 2009! That's perfect for me to get on the road to financial freedom! I am cutting up my other cards today! It is liberating to cut up credit cards and to know that I am going to be benefiting my family by learning how to get out of debt and stay out of debt! I am going to be cut down to one monthly payment too instead of two which will be super nice!! I am hoping though that I will be able to get it all paid off by the time that I am done! Shane should be proud as I will be done soon with being in debt! I am working really hard to get myself in a better spot financially so that I can go back to school! I need to make more money so that things are not so tight and stressful around here and to do so, well I am going to have to work at it!

Monday, May 5, 2008

Work Fun!!

Yay! I am now in the happy confines of the office....not really wanting to get on the ball this morning but I need as much billable time as possible so I must be snappin' to it!! I am hoping to have a full calendar and get my full amount of productivity by the 1/2 way point this month so that I can apply for the raise that I would be entitled. Basically after you have worked in the industry for 2 years you are entitled to get a $3000/yr would be nice to have that kick in by June 1st so that my maternity leave would be paid at that rate. Who knows if it wil lhappen though? I am going to start working on it with my boss this week. I have a ton of paperwork to sort through on my desk and oodles of stuff to go over this week so things should be smooth sailing from here. Yay!! LOL! Not really that great but I am ready to get on the go and find out what the future holds for me as I feel that I am stuck in this deadend job at the moment. Do other people feel confused, frustrated and stuck??


Hello all! I guess to get started I should write a bit about myself, who I am and what I hope to accomplish by blogging and putting myself out there for others to read!

My name is Amanda. I am a 25 year old mom of a wonderful little boy who is the light of my life! He is truly amazing and daily he never ceases to amaze me with something new he has learned or something sweet that he does. I can't believe that my baby will be 5 this summer, it seems like only yesturday I was cuddling him and holding him close to me!

Baby #2 is on the far she has been healthy even though my body does not love pregnancy and it seems to hurt all the time from being preggo! I just want to feel good again. Lately I have been battling insomnia something awful and added to the horrilbe heartburn that I get when I am pregnant, well I am in for a boatload of fun these last few weeks. I am currently 28 weeks 6 days preggo! I can't believe that she could be here in as short as 7 weeks and 1 day and be completely healthy. I still feel like so much needs to get done before she gets here and I feel like it is so hard to get it all done in time.

I work in the social work field, I am a recovery specialist at a mental health facility. I don't love my job, the beaurocracy actually kind of sickens me. Plus the fact that I am living on next to nothing wages doesn't really help me out much either. I feel underpaid and undercompensated for what I do, also I am salary so I do not get overtime. In the past I have worked in mental health at a hospital where I got overtime so I am used to being able to make a lot more money than I make where I am currently at.

I am actually looking into going back to school because if something were to happen to my man (God forbid, please don't take him!) I would not be able to care for the two kids or take care of them as needed. Yep, I would be lost and I would not be able to even keep them in the same lifestyle that they would be accustomed to. So back to school for me. I've looked into get my MA and going back to school to be a high school English teacher, both of which would cost me about $30,000-40,000 in continueing education costs and would only yeild me a $10,000/yr raise....this just isn't going to be good enough for me and when I go back to school I am not going to be able to do much else. I am going to have to get it right this time as I can't keep going back to school like I could have in a different life, I need to get it right this time. Anyways the conclusion is that I am going to go into a medical technical field. I am looking into programs now for Radiology Technician (xrays, anyone?), Surgery Technician, and Sonographer (songrams...). I am checking to see which one has the shortest time of going to school and which one will be the best option for me. I am hoping to return to school in January of 2009 full time and to either cut back to part time at my current position if I were to be allowed or to find a part time job where I will enjoy what I do and make decent wages (probably a coffee shop and if I have to resort, Starbucks).

So I have a ton of things to plan and do this summer. We are getting a pool pass for the family. It should be nice to be able to take Andrew to the pool. I am sure that he will enjoy it and it will give us a nice way to let off some of his energy! Right now he hates the daycare that he is at...I guess in part because his daycare before our last move was wonderful and he had so many little friends and here he hasn't had the same luck in finding friends and he has had a hard time after having moved and then being put in a daycare that is so different from what we had before. It is not that there were a lot of options as things in the small town that we moved to were limited. But they do have a nice summer camp program at the Y and he will be able to join in that fun starting at the begining of June. I am hopeful that he will enjoy it more. Plus I will be home hopefully just a few weeks after that on leave.

I am living with and dating the world's most amazing man. And let me tell you, after a series of failed and horrible relationships, well it is about time that luck in love should come my way. Shane is truly an amazing person, he is sweet, caring, considerate and yep he is still a man! LOL!

I figure a blog will give me an outlet, a place to vent when things at my social work job get to to be too much. A place for me to be able to talk about my children and to express how thankful and blessed I feel each day to have them be a part of my life and an outlet for the extra stress of going back to school. I want a place where I can be me, write annonymously and be able to feel like something is gotten out of it. I plan on writing about all aspects and details of my life and using this as my personal salvation and personal post into my soul. I do sometimes write poetry or short stories and stuff and I feel that this is a place where I will be able to share them as well.

To be honest I just need a space that is me about me and that allows me to talk about the things that I love and dislike in life. I hope you enjoy!!